I wanted

I wanted you on this trip. The train is waiting. I had room for you and rowan.

5a.m. wide awake. I dreamt of riding bikes with you.

Hi baby!

Since we both are on some rocky seas at the moment, I have decided to give you a present! Yes!! A present just for you. :)

A first aid kit. For your heart. When you get down, or your mind starts running amok, read this. It is for you and you alone. From a place that I had no idea existed in me:

Dear Kathy,
     I don't like you all that much. You stink when you fart, you can be snarky and stubborn, and complain a LOT. And you put your underwear on backwards.  When you get older you will be wrinkly and bitchy and mean. 
    I have a sickness. I can't get enough of you. I want all the stinky, wrinkly, bitchy meanness you throw at me, and I want it all.  Because I am terribly in love with you. I was just kidding about the not liking you part. ;)

     Love is a word invented for us. As much as it frustrates the shit out of me you not doing something about your living situation, I know it is from a good heart that your lack of movement comes from. THIS MAKES ME LOVE YOU MORE! How the hell is this possible? You are living with a guy and I am patient when anyone in their right mind would run screaming!!  The reason? Because I know you. And even though things seem fucked up, I really get it. Yes my life would be exponentially easier, and in turn yours would be if just for this gesture, but you needed to see me be truly patient with our love.  I really get it. You are so beautiful on the inside I often forget your external beauty.
     We are each an army in a war, separated by circumstance. We are both fighting to get back to each other. How romantic is that? It is like we are living in a movie, except our happy ending is almost guaranteed.
Keep your head up baby. If I can be positive, surely you can be. And very soon, almost a blink, we will be together, I will shower you in help, and kisses, and love you have only got a taste of. A new family built from the ashes of life beating us down, an existence that not only will inspire jealousy, but also a deep knowledge that all that cross our path shall benefit from. 

Turn those underroos around woman, and get ready for a great life. I love you baby.

-Mark

Love.

I never wanted this. I wanted to have my own place, to date, etc. Yet again fate has different plans.

I don't wish to ask to live together because i am a freeloader. I don't want to live off you. Nor will I. I woke this morning with such gloom it kills me. Im so close. So fucking close. I just need shelter. Im calling places today to try and find it. Please baby make your move soon. Im hanging on here for my life.

I love you with all i have.

Baggage claim.

I find it interesting how you have came to feel your past is a bad thing. It really is not. You would not be you without it. I love,  LOVE your reaction when i don't care. You seem confused. Welcome to the rest of your life being judged only on how you act now, as i should be judged the same. It's kinda nice. And i enjoy giving you no pause in you sharing stories with me of your life. Baggage, we both got it. My heart is big enough to hold yours though for our trip forward.

I love you nugget. :)

When Graphic Designers get bored...

Big Booty Bitches aint got nothin on my baby.

:D


     That was way sooner than both of us thought. I am proud of you for making a stand.  I will now promise, in blood (muhahaha) if need be, the tennants of us going forward. A compact of sorts, except we are not pilgrims, though taking you in the hull of a ship in those funny shoes could be kinda hot..

     I digress.

     First, my love for you shall never waiver, even if you are angry, or get drunk and stupid, as we have both been privy to. Second, I shall forever be true and faithful, no matter how much hottie mcfuckrobots throw themselves at me. Third, I will honor out pact on communication. Always. Number three may be the most important of them all. Fourth, I will help out whenever you need it, and try and volunteer it whenever possible be it dishes or fucking you stupid. Fifth, I will try and take you on a date once a week. It is my feeling that we have to actually be in love to be in love if that makes a damn bit of sense.  Sixth, I will care for and love your daughter as my own, and promise to remember that she already has a dad. I will never step between that relationship nor wish to. Seventh, I promise to call you on your bullshit, but never in a way that is demeaning or spiteful.  Eighth, I promise to have adventures as many times as possible, however how small. Ninth, if I ever get supremely pissed at you, I will calm down before engaging you. I will try and adhere to never going to sleep mad nor hold grudges. Tenth, I promise myself as a partner, a peer. I will always treat you as the same.

     So there you have it, my ten promises. I feel like moses, except I'm not drunk and am not currently fucking anyone of my daughters, oh and I'm not 900 years old. I can't believe people believe that shit. Oh well. I hope that these promises you will offer me as well. We have a whole life and to live and love each other.  So there are my ten. Grab some matches, ill get the kerosene and lets go moses on some shrubbery.

     This is going to be a fun ride. I love you.